"I train father to direct their sons in order to create and preserve family legacies."
This was the personal mission statement I had crafted at a men's retreat in the Fall of 2021. The retreat was in Andover, CT and on the second day of the Men's Mission Weekend that was hosted by The Crucible Project.
But before I detail how this mission came about, I wanted to share how I got there in the first place. In early 2021, my wife had announced that she wasn't happy with our relationship and she decided to move out. I was devastated and somewhat desperate. I decided to try an "initial weekend" at the Crucible Project in Como, Colorado, as recommended by a friend of mine. It was an amazing experience and I was curious about what else they had to offer, so I signed up for the mission weekend.
While I was there, it was a unseasonably warm. The sun was out, the colors were changing, and the acorns were falling in abundance. We were at the Channel 3 Kids Camp. It was filled with old summer bunks, trails, a main lodge, and all the other classic summer camp amenities. After some exercises to prompt us and help us cobble together a first draft of our mission statement, we were sent off to where ever we please to hone our statement, how ever we please.
So I found a place up a hill about a quarter mile away from the main building. There was a picnic table in the center of an opening in the trees. Nearby was an old lunch shack and up the hill further were several of the camp bunks, scattered every 30 feet or so. Golden and orange leaves were all over ground. Other leaves fell ever so frequently, like a gentle snow. None of the other weekend participants were in sight or ear shot. No sound was made except by me, the occasional bird's wings, and the steady thud of falling acorns.
So with roughly two hours to spare and no phones (no tech or time telling devices were allowed on the weekend) I decided to do some shadow boxing. Physical activity always activated my ideas. Then, I walked around the bunks, found a rather tall rock to crawl and explored the area a bit more. It reminded me of my childhood days in the Boy Scouts.
I finally came back to the picnic table to begin iterating on my mission statement. I closed my eyes and so many memories came rushing in from childhood. Memories good and bad, some by myself, with family, and with friends. All these memories prompted by the exercises we did earlier as a group. I had visions of what I wanted differently for my self and in turn for others. I began writing out by hand several different versions. Each time I would stand up from, and recite it out loud and see how it felt emotionally, in my gut. Until finally I landed on the statement I shared above.
You see, my father is the hardest working man that I know. He has a crazy sense of humor and is easy to talk to, but... he is passive. It's hard for me to share this with you all but: I wanted my father to be more involved, to be more directional, to lead. I know in my heart he did his best. But now, I want to continue the journey and ensure I am the father I always wanted mine to be, and to help other men realize their own potential. So my mission is born out of my own childhood wound. The little boy in me just wanted to be pointed in the right direction. I had a vision of a man kneeling and pointing down a trail, his hand is outstretched. A young boy is next to him. The man has his on hand on the boy's back. They are on a high alpine meadow, pine trees dot the landscape.
I left that weekend not knowing how I would fulfill the mission but knowing that I would someday. It took over a year until I finally did something about this burning mission of mine, and began Legacy Father. Fast forward even more and I now have a daughter of my own, Amelia, with my wife, Kim.
Today I have refined the organization's mission statement:
Legacy Father trains, motivates, and inspires fathers to better direct their sons and love their daughters in order to create and preserve their legacies.
How exactly do we do all that?
We host in-person and virtual events, from 5Ks to Father meetups. Join a community of other Fathers and grow your legacy shoulder to shoulder.
Check out the Events page.
Legacy Father aims to bring fathers daily motivation with the Question of the Day, dad jokes, and other daily posts on our socials.
We have weekly podcasts that cover influential, innovative, and prevalent historical figures and their fathers. What can we learn from the fathers of some of the greatest people of all time? Who was Rosa Park's father? Theodore Roosevelt? Thomas Edison? Join us as we get nerdy with history and answer tough questions about being a father.